Today is the Spring Carnival at my school. My school. The one where I started teaching one week after he left. My home away from home that became mine when he left…The one where both my girls went…youngest still goes.
Today is the Spring Carnival at my school (and my daughter’s) and I don’t have my kids…
so my ex is taking my kids to my school for the Spring Carnival.
Something a family is supposed to do together.
Something that I should rightfully be able to experience and enjoy with my kids…it is MY community after all. He didn’t want to be any part of it…he made that clear.
But he’s the “good guy” and if the munchkin asks for (and it isn’t an inconvenience for him)…she receives. And truly, if she wanted to go, I would be more mad if he chose not to take her.
So what am I doing today??
I’m trying to enjoy the sunshine and make good choices. Choices about what’s good for me and keeps me from brooding.
I’m trying.
Making Sense from MY Perspective 
I feel for you. I even get this feeling of resentment when it is one step down (him spending time with my grand-daughter) when one of the reasons he gave for leaving was because he wanted to relive his youth (with adventures) and not be tied to family. Now he appears happy playing the devoted grandfather. I try to combat that resentment by doing all I can whenever I can to be the stable, loving, caring supportive one for my children and grandchildren.
It’s exhausting trying to always do the “right thing” when it seems those who have caused the most disruption are winning in the end. I hate that more and more in our society it seems that those who “do the right thing” tend to have no benefits…people don’t even have to pay for a loan they promised a bank to pay for when they buy a house anymore these days…they get to walk away with very minimal consequences. And sometimes they can completely vandalize the house on their way out…Just baffles me. Though I know the seemingly lack of benefits won’t stop me from still trying to “do the right thing”…I will always endeavor to be the best mom my kids could ever hope for, and it sounds like you are that for your kids (and grandkids) as well. I enjoy our kindred positions and knowing that you are making it better each day – gives me hope.